Missing Our Before

What happens when the person you love most becomes someone you don't recognize - and the life you built together quietly disappears?

When Jenny Handy's husband began suffering from chronic pain, she expected to feel compassion. What she didn't expect were the waves of anger, loneliness, guilt, and grief that followed - emotions no one ever told her were normal, and that she couldn't find a single book to help her understand.

Missing Our Before is that book.

Written not by a doctor or therapist, but by a wife who lived it, this deeply personal guide speaks directly to the partners, spouses, and loved ones who are quietly falling apart in the background. The ones who sit on the couch in silence. Who cry in the shower. Who wonder if wanting to feel loved again makes them a terrible person.

It doesn't.

With raw honesty and hard-won wisdom, Jenny walks you through the emotional truth of loving someone in chronic pain - the resentment you're ashamed of, the connection you're desperate to reclaim, and the grief no one told you that you were allowed to feel. Through her five-step Way Forward framework, you'll learn to stop losing yourself, stop taking the pain personally, and start rebuilding a relationship that is different from what you imagined - and still deeply, beautifully worth fighting for.

You are not alone. Your feelings are real. And there is a way back to each other.